Birth plans and preferences
This page explores birth plans and preferences, highlighting the importance of flexibility, informed choices, birth settings, and support partners.
Your birth preferences
Setting out your birth preferences is an important step in preparing yourself and discovering what's important to you when it comes to meeting your newest family member. You might feel like you don't even know what you don't know about giving birth - even if it's not your first time.
It makes sense to talk about birth preferences rather than a birth plan. If you are someone who likes to plan in detail, one plan will not cover everything when it comes to birth - you'll need a plan A, plan B and perhaps plan C too. If you plan for a caesarean, what is your preference if you go into labour before the date? If you plan to labour, what is your pain relief preference if you are offered a hormone drip for slow progress?
Explore your options
You might be someone who likes to go with the flow, in which case your birth preference will be to follow recommendations from the care providers with you at the time. If that is you, it is still recommended to understand some of the decisions you will be faced with during birth, because once things are underway, it is much harder to consider new information.
Taking time to read, think and explore your options puts you in control of decisions, and evidence shows us that control means better birth experiences. This is true regardless of whether birth goes according to plan A.
Birth planning
Where you plan to birth affects the type of birth, you're more likely to experience. The pain relief on offer depends on the setting.
Of course, as well as choosing the setting, there is the question of who to involve. Having a birth partner who is well prepared to support you can have a direct impact on your ability to relax and birth.
Once these big decisions are made, there are lots of smaller decisions for you to make. Antenatal education can be really helpful to inform your birth preferences.
NHS.uk provides a birth planning guide and template with lots of items to consider. You can bring any questions to your midwife appointments as you develop your birth preferences.
Who should I choose as my birth partner?
For some people, it is obvious who they would prefer to have as their birthing partner. Some people are sure they want their life partner or co-parent to be present at the birth and others choose to have a close friend or family member with them. Whoever you choose, it is important they know your wishes and you have discussed your birth plan with them. Whoever you choose, it's important that you trust them, feel confident with them and that they are supportive of what you want. They should be able to stay calm and positive and be able to take control or speak on your behalf if needed.
When you're in labour it is sometimes hard to remember everything, so make sure your birth partner has a copy of your birth plan or knows exactly what you want. That makes it easier for them to tell your birthing team what you want and what you don't want when you're birthing.
Some people choose to hire a birthing advocate, such as a doula if you want extra help on hand or someone experienced in helping with birth and the postnatal period. An experienced birth advocate can provide support and guidance to your birthing partner if they are less familiar with birthing. Sometimes a close friend or family member who is confident about birth from their own experiences can be supportive to you and your main birth partner.
What does my birth partner need to know?
Your birth partner is the person who will help you get through labour, whatever it brings and welcome your newborn into the world. It's a very special experience and they can help by comforting you, offering you refreshments and reminding you how to use your relaxation and breathing techniques. Some women find that it helps to use hypnobirthing techniques with their birthing partner during their pregnancy. Your birth partner will be a vital person to help explain to your birthing team what you need and can help you feel more in control of the situation, especially if things are not happening as you expected.